M is for...

Messes.

Saturday I googled "how to get nail polish out of carpet" I think that would explain what kind of day I had.

I'm not really sure why I decided to paint my nails. No one sees my toes in the winter since they are perpetually little blocks of ice and require at least one pair of socks, but I do see my toes when I wash them and its just nice to look at painted toes. Sorry men, you don't have to try and understand why women just feel more complete with painted nails. For me though that would be only toes. Painted fingernails distract me and I get far too distracted all ready, so I leave my fingers boring.

I wasn't going to paint my nails, but I just couldn't help myself and so I dug out the bottle of dark pink nail polish and started painting away.

I waited a few short seconds. My feet were fast becoming cold and turning blue, so I decided to apply the second coat. I shook the bottle of nail polish and...

catastrophe happened.

Somebody hadn't put the lid securely back on and thus there was nail polish on the carpet. Nail polish on my skin which was the least of my worries by the way. Nail polish on my favorite pair of jeans.

For some unexplained reason I swabbed my arm first with alcohol (rubbing of course), but that just reminded me of that terrible time when there unsuccessful attempt to draw some blood in my arm and I was poked for a very excruciating long time. I moved to cleaning the carpet, since with enough showering my arm would eventually stop looking like a four year old's.

I ran to my computer with speed not even close to the speed of light, but I did feel like I could have broke an Olympic record. I googled "how to get nail polish out of carpet. And then I applied a host of products to the vandalized area.

All the while I was very put out with myself. Why on earth did I decided my nails need a bit of color? I mean really pale pink nails, really don't look that bad.  They just look sickly.

Then I wondered why I had to be created a woman, for if I wasn't a female I wouldn't have wanted to look feminine and beautiful in the first place. I wasn't exactly feeling very thankful for God's creation at that point.

I wondered why I had to be so vain and paint my nails. Was I expecting to need a IV in my foot and thus would need to look good for the doctors?

I cleaned and scrubbed some more and wondered the above things all over again  and again.

Then I ate some chocolate and a little bit more chocolate.

I managed to cleanse the carpet of all the evidence and went to work on my jeans. My very most favorite pair of jeans that have just now started to fit me again. Never mind I bought them at a garage sale for a $1 four years age. A favorite a pain of jeans cannot be just replaced. One lady on the internet ruined her $400 pair of jeans that maybe feel a small bit better.

All is well that ends well. The carpet got clean. My jeans only have a very faints pink mark which I will say is the new hip and cool jeans.

On the bright side the fact that I peeled off a good portion of my fingernail while peeling carrots now seems to be a very small pimple on the face of my life.

Maybe when summer comes I will have the courage to paint my nails....while wearing old shorts and sitting on a old slab of cement.