Emptiness, I never knew that it smelled, but when I walked into the dorm that hadn’t been occupied for three months I knew what emptiness smelled liked. Staleness reeked the room as much as the echoes of bare rooms rocketed about the empty dorm. It’s a weird feeling to be in place that you don’t really feel like you belong, yet is to be your home. College graduates do not make their home in cold dorm rooms, no they go into the world and make their path.
Apparently I missed that memo, because this fall I’m moving back into a college dorm as if I never walked the stage with diploma in hand three months ago. I’m not doing it to take classes and no in case you were wondering I wasn’t failed either. In fact homework and I will probably keeping a nice distance from each other for quite a while. Instead I will be busy in the kitchen cooking meals and focusing on spending time with the girls as an assistant dean.
When I was asked to stay at the school and work after graduation. Thousands of thoughts raced through my mind. Maybe that was why it took over four months for me to give a honest answer. Seriously some how you expect that when you have graduated from college that you will go far from the college and do great things. Cooking meals and supervising homework laden girls in the same school you just graduated from really doesn’t seem all that spectacular.
What if I were to tell you though I was going abroad. Going to a college in China to be their cook and to live in a college dorm and mentor the girls. Wouldn’t that sound wonderful? Would you not think that was a good and noble ministry? I know I would, so why is it when the ministry comes to you in a very unexpected and seemingly most unexpected way do you question if it really is a ministry?
Some how I have this impression in my mind that ministry must be different and exotic then anything I have ever done before. I forget that ministry is the first person you see in the morning, even if it is your mother. Ministry is the way you live life. Ministry is building up those around you serving them as Christ so humbly did for us.
For me ministry will be feeding hungry people and hopefully keeping them from having food poisoning. Ministry for me will be encouraging girls in their walk with the Lord as they fight the insane jungle of college life. Probably this is not the ministry you were called too. No your ministry is described quite differently then mine because God called you to it not me. God is equipping you for your unique ministry just like He is going to give me the power to do whatever comes my way.
Please do not tell me I’m doing this job because I was too scared to do anything else. The closer I get to my first day the more terrified I become. Really being put in two positions of responsibility is the most daunting thing in the world to me.
God’s grace will carry me. Just like it did my freshmen year when I nearly quit at Christmas break. Grace brought me back for a second year when I didn’t want too and Grace took me through my senior year. When I knew I had to yes to this job, but wasn’t sure if I could God removed the fear and gave peace.
Adventures are awaiting me and I’m following the God who has taken me through all the adventures before.
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